It’s a universal truth, one that’s widely known,
Whether they’re sexting an intern or tapping a phone,
Where politicians go, scandals always will follow,
As Clinton well knows, the truth’s hard to swallow.

All over the world, revelations astound,
Accusations of blackmail and sex tapes abound,
But Hong Kong’s politicians are rather less tawdry,
Their downfall? Illegal conservatories.

While British papers are questioned for monitoring phones,
Our reporters use cranes to peer into the homes
Of civil servants whose houses have back-door extensions,
Who knew a basement could cause so much political tension?

So as Bo Xilai’s wife goes ‘round poisoning folks,
And UK MPs spend public money on moats,
Poor CY’s gotta bow down at our feet,
And fill in his basement with a ton of concrete.

Watergate in the 70s was the height of deceit
Who cares ‘bout a garage that’s been grown a few feet?
Why have our politicians been publicly flayed,
When the world’s all but forgotten Strauss-Kahn and the maid?

That’s not to say we side with CY to the letter,
(A building surveyor really ought to know better),
But when you look at the scandals borne by the world’s politicians,
Aren’t there worse things in life than not getting planning permission?