The Pop Star's New Clothes

By HK staff | Apr 19, 2007

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Once upon a time, in a magical city far away, there lived a 14-year-old pop star whose mother cared very much about her income.

“How can my daughter earn the notoriety of a porn star while retaining the highly bankable innocence of a child?” she wondered.

Unfortunately, the law of the land was quite specific and did not allow child pornography or exploitation.

“Oh, it’s not fair!” exclaimed the poor mother. “I’ll have to wait until my little darling is of Britney’s age.”

But this was no ordinary city. It was a magical city, where real was oftentimes fake and fake oftentimes real. And in it lived little “wardrobe assistants” who could make very special clothes from hardly any cloth at all.

“This self-adhesive bra,” they said, “is visible only in the case of legal scrutiny. When worn under a negligee, it enables the wearer to appear almost nude without actually being so.”

So the assistants dressed the 14-year-old girl in the invisible clothes, sat her in a pool of water and took a lot of suggestive pictures.

Later, when the pictures were posted around town, a rumor began to spread that the girl was not properly dressed. She was, in fact, half-naked and posed like a porn star.

So a magistrate was enlisted to find out whether she was really naked or not. For many weeks he studied the contours of her breasts beneath the magical garb. He also studied them after work, on his PDA on the way home, and for hours in solitude in his study. For he wanted to make the right judgment, of course.

Finally, the judge announced that the girl was in fact fully clothed. You see, her nipples were artfully concealed by the magical garb that only judges could detect. The townsfolk, however, did not possess this legal acuity. What they saw when they looked at the dripping wet 14-year-old girl, alluringly posed, was just that: a dripping wet 14-year-old girl, alluringly posed. And thanks to the magical “invisible” clothes, it was the judge who ended up looking quite the boob.

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