SATURDAY
I celebrate being tattoo free by having a beer with my Swedish neighbor who – when I knocked on his door – was already having a beer. It is 1 PM and we are still in our underwear. We grab HK Magazine’s own William Zachary Hines and hop into a taxi to the stadium, armed...
To commemorate Hong Kong Sevens weekend, I went on a four-day bender. Part one of my diary:
Thursday
I wake up feeling sober, alert, and exhausted. It is the ungodly hour of 7am, a time when only school teachers and guys who do runs in really short shorts are up. Normally I’d try to sleep in...
Here we go, the Rugby Sevens, our little slice of weekend heaven,
The place where we can see our brethren, and also hooligans on tour,
Here, right here, is screaming Sheila, and high school kids, and their mom, Amelia,
Drunk as the others, and wait here’s dad, he’s passed out on the...
The Hong Kong Sevens start next Friday! Do you know what you’re dressing up as? If the answer’s not Drunk English/Australian Guy in a Rugby Shirt, I’ve got some suggestions for you:
A Rugby Player: If it looks like there’s no way you could actually play Rugby professionally...
I’m going to come to the defense of Taipei here for a second because it’s getting a bad rap or rather, an incorrect rap. Somebody (i.e. girls) has cruelly spread a rumor that guys only go to Taipei to hook up, do crazy drugs, go to KTV parlors, and participate in various flesh-related...
When my sister first told me about Groupon, I thought she had contracted some sort of terrible STD. “Slow down now,” I nervously said. “Why are you telling me this? I’m not a doctor—that’s just something I tell girls in clubs.” “No,” she...
After learning recently that a lot of kids (3 or 4) read “HK Magazine” and a percentage of those (1 or 2) read my column, I realized that some of the content might not have been appropriate for a young audience. For instance, since this is an uncensored publication, unless you talk...
My top Valentine’s Day blunders, all flowers-related, in chronological order:
Guangzhou—2002
I was living in Beijing on a study abroad program and our class took a trip down to Random Factorytown, Southern China, aka the most romantic place in the world. At the time I was kinda...
After months of protesting, I’m about-facing and jumping straight on the bandwagon. It’s too cold in Hong Kong. I don’t like it. And nobody else does except furry dogs and stupid people that think black sweaters are actually slimming.
So I’m done. I’m done mocking...
Happy Chinese New Year everyone! I wish you health, prosperity and wealth in the Year of the Snow Deer! Actually, it’s the Year of the Rabbit, but I bet you didn’t know that. You probably thought the rabbit was just in some “Sex in the City” episode, or a cute...
